The Inner Critic: Stopping Negative Self Talk

Stop avoiding your inner critic, face them, and transform!

We all have an inner critic, sometimes helpful but often damaging. Stopping negative self talk, facing the inner critic and even practising befriending them can be liberating and confidence-boosting. In this method, we first notice and articulate how our inner critic shows up, then we turn toward the critic and really feel them. Finally, we reflect on the process.

What is
The Inner Critic: Stopping Negative Self Talk
about ?

What is

The Inner Critic: Stopping Negative Self Talk

about ?

What is this Method about ?

How is Stopping Negative Self Talk used?

When and why is this Method used ?

This method is best used when we notice that we sabotage ourselves, when we repeatedly avoid doing things we would like to do or repeatedly find ourselves thinking destructive thoughts. This is the most potent moment to engage this method.
Confronting the inner critic consciously allows us to come to terms with those sabotaging patterns.

Where does this Method come from ?

Original Source Details

The exercise "Inner Critic: Stopping negative self talk" was developed by Annika Piirimits of Legacy 17 for the empowerment workbook Live Your Power (available for free from hostingempowerment.eu).

Audience

Is participant experience relevant for The Inner Critic: Stopping Negative Self Talk ?

It's okay if participants haven't seen the inside of a classroom in years

Audience description for The Inner Critic: Stopping Negative Self Talk

This method is best suited to those who are interested in doing some fairly deep inner work.

Requirements

Experience level of the facilitator

Taken part OR some facilitation experience

Number of Facilitators :

Location requirements

Writing surfaces for participants

Run Through for the Inner Critic

Run Through

Pre Exercise

Steps

Introduction

We all have an inner critic, sometimes helpful but often damaging. Stopping negative self talk, facing the inner critic and even practising befriending them can be liberating and confidence-boosting. The inner critic is a voice that speaks ill of what we do, say, or even think. Usually we acquired it in childhood. We all have our own negative statements that the inner critic repeats like a broken record. These statements bring us down, stop us from thinking and acting with boldness and conviction, and they aren’t true. Maybe they were true at one particular moment in the past and from then on they stick as if they were everlasting truth. Stopping negative self talk can be a life-changing transformation.

Noting how the inner critic shows up for you

Let’s begin by noting what the inner critic communicates to you. List (in the workbook or your own journal) the words you hear (for example “You are so clumsy! You can’t do anything right.” ) or the sensations you experience (such as, for example, feeling very small or your stomach clenches.)

Going Deeper by drawing or writing

Close your eyes and see if an image of the critic emerges (shape, colour, symbol, image etc.). If it’s a person, do they have a gender and age? How are they dressed? Do they have a name? Make a drawing of them or write a description (or both) below.

Noting what you noted

Look at what you drew and wrote on the previous page and ask yourself: What do I see/read? What do I feel when I look at/read it? Note your answers in the workbook or in your journal.

Reflection

Reflect: if that voice were to be encouraging you rather than discouraging you, what would you like it to be saying? Add this message to your note. If you don’t find an encouraging message, don’t worry. You can come back to this exercise later.

In the future...

Next time you hear them criticise you, pause what you are doing and remember the image you drew. Say aloud or internally: I notice that you are here and I hear you. Please encourage me instead of criticising.

Post Exercise

Ongoing

Know that this might be really intense for some participants. Consider taking a break afterward or suggesting that everyone go for a walk on their own or in pairs. Know that each time you do this exercise the results can change.

Online

Potential for Solely Online & Blended Learning

Does Stopping Negative Self Talk work online?

Yes! It is important to keep a close connection with the participants, to monitor if anyone is going somewhere unmanageably deep, but for an experienced facilitator, this should be fine.

Material for

MaterialMaterial : Ballpoint Pens, Drawing Paper, Drawing/Painting Supplies, Marker Pens

Additional Material Description

Please find below downloadable, printable or digitally fillable worksheets that are excerpted from "Live Your Power". To download the full workbook, visit hostingtransformation.eu.

Additional Resources Description

Create materials with tender, love and care in : 5 min

Create materials quick and dirty in : 5 min

Impact

Hidden Curriculum The hidden curriculum in Stopping negative self talk is about how mindfulness, awareness and non-identification with our thoughts can lead to an empowering inner liberation.

Individual EmpowermmentBy emphasizing that Stopping negative self talk is a process — not a one-shot deal — we can soften the expectations of "fixing" the problem all at once. It is also empowering to normalize the fact that everyone has some sort of inner critic, who may shift and morph over time. But we can all also work to come into a relationship with our critic such that we are not crippled by them.

The Inner Critic: Stopping Negative Self Talk

project

IN WHICH THIS method WAS DEVELOPED

Hosting Empowerment

ERASMUS +

Co-funded by the Erasmus+ Program of the European Union. Find more information about the program and its goals here: https://erasmus-plus.ec.europa.eu/.

Views and opinions expressed are however those of the author(s) only and do not necessarily reflect those of the European Union or the European Education and Culture Executive Agency (EACEA). Neither the European Union nor EACEA can be held responsible for them.

Creative Commons license:

CC-BY-SA You are free to distribute, remix, adapt, and build upon the material in any medium or format, even for commercial purposes with mention of the source: Transformation Hosts International, www. hostingtransformation.eu. If you remix, adapt, or build upon the material, you must license the modified material under identical terms.